I have gone from woman
to proxy mom in a little over a month! D and I have had his daughter, A, every
weekend now, and while I absolutely love it and wouldn't change it, it has not
been easy. She is a wonderful little girl, and a joy to be around, but the
things she is going through in her life right now are having an effect on her.
There is a lot of drama involving her mother and quite a bit of changes that
she has coming at her. The biggest one is that her mom is heading off to jail
for 30 days for some charges she had a while back. She is calling it a ‘vacation’
and tells A that she will have to stay at her grandma’s house while she is away.
With her staying there, D and I will not be able to see her as there are some
conflicts between them all. So not only will her mom be away for a month, but essentially,
her dad will be to. That mixed with some of the things I have seen from her mom
and the way there are living, they make me really sad for her. I am so thankful
that we get to be part of that little girls life and bring in some joy and
structure to her chaotic life. I have spent some time with S, her mom, and
while I do like her and respect her as A’s mom, I feel like she is being
irresponsible in the choices she is making and she can be a bit reckless in the
way she chooses to deal with A. I really hope that this time in jail will help
turn her life around. I want us to be there for A whenever she needs it and
hopefully be a good example for S to follow.
On the other end of this, I think this has been such a refreshing change for D and I and has really helped us to learn and grow together. We have been getting along exceptionally well, taking time to really listen and understand each other, and really have something we connect and unite over. I love watching him in the dad role, my heart melts every time! He is so good with her and you can tell he loves the heck outta her! She has been a little blessing that not only brought us closer, brought more joy and love into our life, and helped us grow as a couple, but it showed us that we are truly ready to have one of our own. We have matured a lot in the last month and we now know that we can parent together, that we have the same morals and beliefs when it comes to raising children, and we know how to balance the life we had with the one we now have all while maintaining a healthy relationship. This has been a whirlwind but it has been absolutely amazing! Who knew that I could be this happy???!! If someone would have told me 2 years ago that this would be my life, I would have thought they were crazy! I thought for sure my life was over and I would never be happy or have a future that I would be ecstatic about, but boy was I wrong! We still have a lot of work to do to get where we want to be, but we are at a damn good start!
On the other end of this, I think this has been such a refreshing change for D and I and has really helped us to learn and grow together. We have been getting along exceptionally well, taking time to really listen and understand each other, and really have something we connect and unite over. I love watching him in the dad role, my heart melts every time! He is so good with her and you can tell he loves the heck outta her! She has been a little blessing that not only brought us closer, brought more joy and love into our life, and helped us grow as a couple, but it showed us that we are truly ready to have one of our own. We have matured a lot in the last month and we now know that we can parent together, that we have the same morals and beliefs when it comes to raising children, and we know how to balance the life we had with the one we now have all while maintaining a healthy relationship. This has been a whirlwind but it has been absolutely amazing! Who knew that I could be this happy???!! If someone would have told me 2 years ago that this would be my life, I would have thought they were crazy! I thought for sure my life was over and I would never be happy or have a future that I would be ecstatic about, but boy was I wrong! We still have a lot of work to do to get where we want to be, but we are at a damn good start!
